• Many things - such as loving, going to sleep, or behaving unaffectedly - are done worst when we try hardest to do them.
    C S Lewis

      British writer - Died 1963

  • A professor is someone who talks in someone else's sleep.
    W H Auden

      American-English poet - Died 1973

  • Sleep when your baby sleeps. Everyone knows this classic tip, but I say why stop there? Scream when your baby screams. Take Benadryl when your baby takes Benadryl. And walk around pant-less when your baby walks around pant-less.
    Tina Fey

      American actress and comedian

  • I'm going to bed really means "I'm going to lie in my bed and go on my phone".
    Unknown Author


  • A day without a nap is like a cupcake without frosting.
    Terri Guillemets

      American quotation anthologist

  • Early to bed and early to rise probably indicates unskilled labor.
    John Ciardi

      American poet - Died 1986

  • Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives.
    William Charles Dement

      American author

  • If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.
    Henny Youngman

      English-American comedian - Died 1998

  • When people tell me "You're going to regret that in the morning", I sleep in until noon because I'm a problem solver.
    Unknown Author


  • Those who snore always fall asleep first.
    Unknown Author


  • Late last night I slew my wife, Stretched her on the parquet flooring; I was loathe to take her life, but I had to stop her snoring!
    Harry Graham

      English writer - Died 1936

  • I'm trying to read a book on how to relax, but I keep falling asleep.
    Jim Loy

      Former US Secretary of Homeland Security

  • I think sleeping was my problem in school. If school had started at four in the afternoon, I'd be a college graduate today.
    George Foreman

      Former American boxer and media personality

  • Everyone should have kids. They are the greatest joy in the world. But they are also terrorists. You'll realize this as soon as they are born and they start using sleep deprivation to break you.
    Ray Romano

      American comedian

  • We used to sleep five to a bed and three of them used to wet the bed. I learned to swim before I could walk.
    Bernard Manning

      English comedian - Died 2007